...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Randomize
