Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
