I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
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