Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Randomize
