Just mADE A PArabola og urine
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
