Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
