Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
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