can u get pink eye on your cock?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Randomize
