Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I fill condoms, not promises.
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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