you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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