dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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