I just made out with a guy for $7.
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
If I'm going to risk life and limb to wear a Wings jersey to the Garden next week, the least they can do is win.
And the most would be ending up in bed with one of them.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Omg I joined a choir last night...
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
