i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
