I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Randomize
