who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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