i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
