White coat. Heels.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
Know what's awesome? Flying a mini helicopter while you shit.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
When you called me you were telling a hobo that you couldn't spare ten bucks bc that was your beer money. All your words were slurred.
Fuck him.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I wrote a pretty good eulogy, too. Motherfucker pastor had no sense of comedic timing.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
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