Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
Randomize
