Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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