that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Randomize
