This girl is more easily done than said...
You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I knew this night was headed for bad when I was drinking cherry bombs out of a sippy cup in the shower
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
