I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
No subtext here. People are naked.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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