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The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Just took an adderall with a shot of tequila while doing my makeup in the parking lot at work before I go in. I'm also late. They're so lucky to have me.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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