No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize
