Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
Good thing you didnt wake up last night. Wouldve found me naked talking to my closet asking to borrow my towel.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
