What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
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