Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
you flipped over the sheets and there was my bed. filled with ding dongs.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize