We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Randomize
