i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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