Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Are you jealous of my sweatsuit? It's how I get men on Tinder.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
Randomize
