what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
Went home last night with that hot British guy. Sounded like I was f-ing in a Harry Potter movie.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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