I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
Randomize
