Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
He made me watch a sex tape him and his gf made. They were in the shower when her roommate walked in on them. Not kidding: she asked to join in.
I hate him. He gets laid, my dick gets laughed at.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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