Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
It was like giving head to a cactus.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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