Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
