We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
Randomize
