he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Im calling him
was mistake calling. If you drunk dial someone you deserve to choke on a tubesock. Take the advice. Always remember
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I was lying I actually don't, I hope a reindeer shitted in her bed
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Randomize
