So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
It must have been an amazing night, I have "my pants are responsible people" written on my pants in permanent marker.
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
I got inside last night via doggy door
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Randomize
