White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I DEMAND FORESKIN
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
