she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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