I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
Randomize
