brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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