and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize