I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
She announced her abortion via fbk
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize