I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
IDK MAYBE BC I WOKE UP IN AN AIRPORT WITH A ONE WAY TICKET TO LONDON
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
