I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Randomize
