3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
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