none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Don't upload the drink o meter to your google calendar. Somehow binge drinking looks even worse with a time stamp.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
Let the clothes fall where they may.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
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