operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I'm pretty sure I just discovered what the American Dream is said the person eating a hotdog for breakfast in bed in her underwear
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Randomize
