i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
Thank you for caring about my cervix.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
