She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
