haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
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